I am sure I am not alone in this but I have a lot of questions about life, if I am honest almost all my questions are for God. It would be easy but hardly edifying or redemptive for me to write down all my questions for God, so I am taking a different approach to this blog/note. I am coming at this from a stand point where I have lots of questions that really seemed to be answered by one word…Grace.
2 Corinthians 12:8-10
Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
This is Paul explaining how God answered his tough question about the thorn in the flesh, and although we are exactly sure what the “thorn” was, looking at Paul’s track record (Philippians 3:1-9) for him to complain 3 times is something of significance; and yet God explains that His Grace is enough for anything.
There are so many times in my life where my heart is extremely frustrated with God, even angry because this isn’t the answer that I want…at times it doesn’t feel as though it is enough.
It breaks my heart to even write those words of honesty down, because as I sit at my desk and look at the cross I have hanging on my wall I am reminded of what it was that Jesus went through that I don’t consider ‘enough’. I don’t like that I can comprehend what is going on or it doesn’t make sense to me, so I get mad throw a temper tantrum and say to Jesus Christ, the risen son of God; “Thanks but what you did wasn’t quite enough for this problem.”
I understand that a lot of this is pride and foolishness; I understand that it is sinful to have this in my heart and yet I can’t stop myself from time after time, spiting in the face of grace and saying “I need more then that.”
See I hear and read many guys “just asking questions” and I hear my own questions being brought up by others as well, which if I am honest I get a sense of relief, kind of that “Whew, at least I am not the only one.”
But then I get scared that we are missing the point, that I am just like the Pharisees who, physically followed Jesus everywhere He went. They witnessed his miracles, the saw him die and rise again, in the flesh they were there! But didn’t KNOW Jesus, and were therefore dead. I don’t want to just follow Jesus around, I want to know him.
David was another on who asked many questions. Reading in the Psalms I am sure many of us can resonate with the cries to God. One of which we read in Psalm 22:1-2;
My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?
Why are you so far from saving me, so far from the words of my groaning?
O my God, I cry out by day, but you do not answer, by night, and am not silent.
But something I love about David’s heart is he always come back to the truth of who God is…his ‘Shepherd’.
Psalms 23 he writes;
The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.
He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters, he restores my soul.
He guides me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake.
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, [a]
I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows.
Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever.
We see again the reoccurring theme of questions from man, and answers from God that may not be what we desire, or how we would like them answered…but really who are we to question God and His love, mercy, grace, compassion, or sovereignty. As my great friend Tyson Liske put it one late night when we were hanging out; “How dare I question God’s faithfulness!”
My amazing wife and I went home back to Alberta for a visit last week and I asked my hero (aka my dad); “What is the point of all these questions?” He told me “It is to get people thinking…”
The conversation continued and my dad explained how this is a dangerous slope and we need to be careful that we aren’t just taking apart and not coming back to the bible for our answers.
But really I am not sure what we are supposed to be thinking about. I mean I do, but how is it edifying, how is it redeeming? We dismantle theology, doctrine, even the bible and truth…in the name of thinking?!?!
After years of questions it is my conviction that many of my burning questions have been answered, and usually they fall under either sin, or grace. It is now my conviction that the best way for me to know Jesus…it to stop asking and submit to God’s sovereignty. For me to let go of understanding and say thank you Jesus.
I know this won’t sit well with lots of people, and I will be the first to say “I COULD BE WRONG!” But man how cool it is when “The peace that transcends all understanding” sinks through the hard walls of my heart, which are built up with so many questions and I hear Him say “My grace is sufficient” and that truth, really does set me free…well I have no questions in those moments.
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Celebrate with Obedience and Surrender
(I have to admit as I post this, my initial thought was; “Think of something cleverer to talk about…” like the message of the gospel isn’t enough. Or we have heard it enough times that we don’t need to be reminded of the life of Jesus, and it is because of this foolishness in my heart that I share this with you. It is because we so desperately need to be reminded of the saving grace of Jesus that I write knowing that nothing else I could say is as important as what Jesus said to us on the cross. Luke 23:34 “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.”
Romans 6:6-7
“We know that our old self was crucified with him in order that the body of sin might be brought to nothing, so that we would not longer be enslaved to sin. For one who has died has been set free from sin.” (ESV)
I have had a lot of time to reflect on my life over the past few weeks. I have spent mornings in silence, sitting in awe and wondering why would the creator of the universe care about me? Why would He save me? With all that is going on in the world, in our cities, in our family, in our own lives…why would he care for and love me?!? Why would he love you?!?
I mean lets face it none of us have a great track record, we are selfish, we love ourselves and long for ‘stuff’ more then life, well most seconds of our lives anyways. Our minds are generally sick and twisted; we treat people as a means to end rather then those that bear the image of God. I am convinced that we are by nature sinful (Rom. 5:12-13,18-19; Rom. 3:2…not to mention The Fall) and yet God still, being faithful in love and grace…loves us.
In fact God by his grace allows us to die to our sin, to become a new creation in Him, in Jesus Christ. I for one have experienced first hand this freeing work of the cross, it’s not a neat story that sounds good to say when things get bad…but the fact of the matter is; because of Jesus’ obedience to the Father in going to the cross, and in dying to myself and surrendering my life, my sin was nailed their with him. I no longer live in guilt and shame of a ‘man’ I once was, but I live as child of the most high God.
I would argue this should bring us to a place of celebration, as this freedom has been made readily available to us all.
1Timothy 1:14-16 says; “and the grace of our Lord overflowed for me with the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus. The saying is trustworthy and deserving of full acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am the foremost. But I received mercy for this reason, that in me, as the foremost, Jesus Christ might display his perfect patience as an example to those who were to believe in him for eternal life”
I really do try to celebrate the work of the cross in my life, but this morning as I was praying I realized that the best way for me to celebrate Jesus is through obedience and surrender. To remain faithful to scripture and in doing so surrendering my life to what ever it is that God would call me to do.
Now I don’t claim this as a new idea, or even my idea for that matter, but I do feel that I am experiencing true joy in being obedient and surrendering this life. I am seeing the fruits of the Spirit (Gal. 5:22) come to fruition in my life…love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.
My heart does not long to celebrate God’s grace by celebrating me, or you…I want to find life in dying to me. I want to be sure that all signs of my life point “Yes, this is because of Jesus.”
I want to celebrate Jesus with obedience and surrender.
Romans 6:6-7
“We know that our old self was crucified with him in order that the body of sin might be brought to nothing, so that we would not longer be enslaved to sin. For one who has died has been set free from sin.” (ESV)
I have had a lot of time to reflect on my life over the past few weeks. I have spent mornings in silence, sitting in awe and wondering why would the creator of the universe care about me? Why would He save me? With all that is going on in the world, in our cities, in our family, in our own lives…why would he care for and love me?!? Why would he love you?!?
I mean lets face it none of us have a great track record, we are selfish, we love ourselves and long for ‘stuff’ more then life, well most seconds of our lives anyways. Our minds are generally sick and twisted; we treat people as a means to end rather then those that bear the image of God. I am convinced that we are by nature sinful (Rom. 5:12-13,18-19; Rom. 3:2…not to mention The Fall) and yet God still, being faithful in love and grace…loves us.
In fact God by his grace allows us to die to our sin, to become a new creation in Him, in Jesus Christ. I for one have experienced first hand this freeing work of the cross, it’s not a neat story that sounds good to say when things get bad…but the fact of the matter is; because of Jesus’ obedience to the Father in going to the cross, and in dying to myself and surrendering my life, my sin was nailed their with him. I no longer live in guilt and shame of a ‘man’ I once was, but I live as child of the most high God.
I would argue this should bring us to a place of celebration, as this freedom has been made readily available to us all.
1Timothy 1:14-16 says; “and the grace of our Lord overflowed for me with the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus. The saying is trustworthy and deserving of full acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am the foremost. But I received mercy for this reason, that in me, as the foremost, Jesus Christ might display his perfect patience as an example to those who were to believe in him for eternal life”
I really do try to celebrate the work of the cross in my life, but this morning as I was praying I realized that the best way for me to celebrate Jesus is through obedience and surrender. To remain faithful to scripture and in doing so surrendering my life to what ever it is that God would call me to do.
Now I don’t claim this as a new idea, or even my idea for that matter, but I do feel that I am experiencing true joy in being obedient and surrendering this life. I am seeing the fruits of the Spirit (Gal. 5:22) come to fruition in my life…love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.
My heart does not long to celebrate God’s grace by celebrating me, or you…I want to find life in dying to me. I want to be sure that all signs of my life point “Yes, this is because of Jesus.”
I want to celebrate Jesus with obedience and surrender.
Friday, May 22, 2009
To passionately pursue and embrace – Philippians 4:8
It is later Thursday evening and my body is exhausted but my mind and heart a very much awakened by a revelation of God.
As I write this I write with much conviction in my own heart of my lack of ‘passionate pursuit and embracing’. It is also my conviction that this is something that we need to do to find fulfillment in Christ Jesus, to whom all glory is due.
To passionately pursue and embrace my sweet Jesus is all my heart longs to do and tonight as I lay awake next to the most beautiful person I know, my wife, God said to me;
“Tim, passionately pursue and embrace what I have given you.”
My mind races and tears begin to well up in my eyes as I realize how much God has given me.
Of course because my flesh can at times get the best of me I begin to think of the “stuff” God has richly blessed me with; job, place to live, cars etc…OH LORD FORGIVE MY SINFUL HEART!
But as I lay in quite, and listened…shhh, just listen…God continued to speak as I asked Him “Lord where do I begin?”
“Philippians 4:8” was the reply, which I felt could have woken up my wonderful wife as I heard it so clearly it could have been audible.
The passage reads; (ESV interpretation)
“Finally, brothers, whatever is TRUE, whatever is HONORABLE, whatever is JUST, whatever is PURE, whatever is LOVELY, whatever is COMMENDABLE, if there is any EXCELLENCE, if there is anything WORTHY OF PRAISE, think about such things.”
So I begin (because this will continue) to meditate and this is my conviction:
Oh God by your grace would you allow me the strength and courage to passionately pursue and embrace
Truth – because there is truth, we have the living, breathing, life giving word of God which is true! It is inerrant (meaning perfect and flawless) and I long to continue to passionately pursue and embrace truth.
Honor – Lord give me discernment to know when to repent of pride, but pursue honor for YOUR GLORY and my joy.
Justice – My great God of Justice break my heart for what breaks yours, may I not stand on the sidelines and witness injustice, but for your sake be a voice and a warrior that fights for justice.
Purity – Jesus in a world that is still a ‘perverted generation’ I want to passionately pursue Purity in my marriage, my words, my motive, my life.
Lovely – Lord may I appreciate and embrace all that is lovely in this world and in my life, you blessed us with a world which I play a part in destroying. God may I passionately pursue the cultivation of all that is lovely.
Commendable – God may I live a life that is commendable, and when people witness this they SEE YOU in my life.
Excellence – Jesus you don’t want my leftovers but you long to make and mold me into your image. This is a call to excellence, my God my flesh is far too weak to do this without you but I will passionately pursue and embrace my call to excellence in all I do, for you Kingdom’s sake.
Worthy of Praise – Jesus you are this, and only you are worthy of any praise, so I will passionately pursuer and embrace you my Jesus. You are my every thing; forgive me oh Jesus for the many times when I seek my own praise…YOU ARE WORTHY MY JESUS!
So this is again my heart, may you be challenged to passionately pursue and embrace all that God has given you.
With much love
-Tim
As I write this I write with much conviction in my own heart of my lack of ‘passionate pursuit and embracing’. It is also my conviction that this is something that we need to do to find fulfillment in Christ Jesus, to whom all glory is due.
To passionately pursue and embrace my sweet Jesus is all my heart longs to do and tonight as I lay awake next to the most beautiful person I know, my wife, God said to me;
“Tim, passionately pursue and embrace what I have given you.”
My mind races and tears begin to well up in my eyes as I realize how much God has given me.
Of course because my flesh can at times get the best of me I begin to think of the “stuff” God has richly blessed me with; job, place to live, cars etc…OH LORD FORGIVE MY SINFUL HEART!
But as I lay in quite, and listened…shhh, just listen…God continued to speak as I asked Him “Lord where do I begin?”
“Philippians 4:8” was the reply, which I felt could have woken up my wonderful wife as I heard it so clearly it could have been audible.
The passage reads; (ESV interpretation)
“Finally, brothers, whatever is TRUE, whatever is HONORABLE, whatever is JUST, whatever is PURE, whatever is LOVELY, whatever is COMMENDABLE, if there is any EXCELLENCE, if there is anything WORTHY OF PRAISE, think about such things.”
So I begin (because this will continue) to meditate and this is my conviction:
Oh God by your grace would you allow me the strength and courage to passionately pursue and embrace
Truth – because there is truth, we have the living, breathing, life giving word of God which is true! It is inerrant (meaning perfect and flawless) and I long to continue to passionately pursue and embrace truth.
Honor – Lord give me discernment to know when to repent of pride, but pursue honor for YOUR GLORY and my joy.
Justice – My great God of Justice break my heart for what breaks yours, may I not stand on the sidelines and witness injustice, but for your sake be a voice and a warrior that fights for justice.
Purity – Jesus in a world that is still a ‘perverted generation’ I want to passionately pursue Purity in my marriage, my words, my motive, my life.
Lovely – Lord may I appreciate and embrace all that is lovely in this world and in my life, you blessed us with a world which I play a part in destroying. God may I passionately pursue the cultivation of all that is lovely.
Commendable – God may I live a life that is commendable, and when people witness this they SEE YOU in my life.
Excellence – Jesus you don’t want my leftovers but you long to make and mold me into your image. This is a call to excellence, my God my flesh is far too weak to do this without you but I will passionately pursue and embrace my call to excellence in all I do, for you Kingdom’s sake.
Worthy of Praise – Jesus you are this, and only you are worthy of any praise, so I will passionately pursuer and embrace you my Jesus. You are my every thing; forgive me oh Jesus for the many times when I seek my own praise…YOU ARE WORTHY MY JESUS!
So this is again my heart, may you be challenged to passionately pursue and embrace all that God has given you.
With much love
-Tim
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